I think i sorta joined a cult last night
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
