We won't sleep together?
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
