WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
