i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Ladies don't puke and tell
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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