Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
