its not stalking. its research.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
