We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
