Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I FOUND THE LEGS
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
