I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
