look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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