office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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