I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
vagina is talking i cant
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Randomize
