So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
is wine microwaveable?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize