i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
