ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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