Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
You need Xanax blowdarts
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
