All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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