I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
