North Korea, Best Korea!
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
