bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
