I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
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