I heard we made out
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Randomize
