did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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