OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
