You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
i need some magic done to my vagina
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize