Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
