I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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