No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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