their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
