I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
