white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
