I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I came so hard my ears popped.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
