Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
