Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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