i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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