Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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