Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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