Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize