Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize