How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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