remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
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