I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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