Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Why are your pants in the freezer?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Randomize
