I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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