In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize