why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
