Sry I called you an 8
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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