And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
