he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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