I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
