Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
